articles: Word from the Inside



By a Gossiping Bitch on October 24th, 2005

We at Gossiping Bitches have always been critical of hip-hop, causing several readers to write us saying things like “why don’t you do it yourself, if you’re so smart?” Well, we are so smart and have indeed decided to start doing it ourselves. That’s right, we have joined the ranks of media companies with their own record labels — because it’s not enough to just report on hip-hop from an objective point of view, we have to be part of the action too! It is this very spirit of selling out that is at the heart (or lack thereof) of the first GB Records release, “Self-Promotion.”

Long ago, before you were born, a collection of the east coast’s finest rappers (and Just Ice) came together to form the Stop the Violence Movement, releasing a single and video called “Self Destruction.” The song was a call to end the senseless killing and other crimes plaguing poor communities everywhere. Soon after its release, it was universally agreed upon that Heavy D had the best verse, and that these violent crimes must stop. And so it came to be that “Self Destruction” is the reason we have no violence today.

With these social issues resolved, it is now time for a new group of rappers to focus on another Important Cause, deserving of your time, attention, and, most importantly, money: themselves. Coming soon to record stores everywhere and online stores we haven’t dissed so hard that they refuse to carry it, is the Cop the CDs Movement’s debut on GB Records: “Self-Promotion.” No marketing is too masturbatory, no shilling too shameless, for the likes of Kanye West, Fat Joe, Fabolous, Pharrell, Busta Rhymes, The Game, Memphis Bleek, Cam’Ron, 50 Cent, Jay-Z (retirement? What retirement?), Mike Jones, Snoop Dogg, and Diddy. The song literally sells itself in a Mobius strip of rapping about advertising yourself and advertising about your rapping. Take their words home and think ’em through, cuz the next rhyme they write damn sure won’t be about you.

Below you will find the front and back sides to the 12″ cover and lyrics to this historic release. In addition, if you turn up your speakers, you can preview the instrumental.



Artists: The Cop the CDs Movement
Kanye West, Fat Joe, Fabolous, Pharrell, Busta Rhymes, The Game, Memphis Bleek, Cam’Ron, 50 Cent, Jay-Z, Mike Jones, Snoop Dogg, Diddy
Song: Self-Promotion

Chorus: Self-Promotion, we’re all about Self-Promotion 2X

[Kanye West]
Well, today’s topic, self-promotion
It really ain’t about just a label or a coast, man
It’s about going for delf, hyping up yourself
Trying to get white people to grab the CD off the shelf
You gotta make a vid
So to help promote my record here’s what I did
I got myself on television
so that I could grab the mic and fight for the spotlight
I’m not negative but the only thing that’s positive
Is that it sells records, kid

[Fat Joe]
Pop pop pop
when it’s hot who’s to blame?
Commercials, VH-1, and my sales are still lame
MC Fat Joe here to state the bottom line
That self-promotion was way before our time

I look like I got hit in the face with a vase
Without Just Blaze, I’d prolly end up like Mase
That’s why I’m down to do every last cameo,
Commercial, or show up in your video,
Back in the eighties these brothers and sisters had skills
So how I’m supposed to pay my bills?
I never ever sold a record because of my vocal
so I stay cashin’ checks from Boost Mobile
cause that’s


Funky Fresh dressed to impress ready to party
Money in my pocket, jewelry extra-gaudy
To get my kicks you paid two hundred dollars
With Billionaire Boys Club attached to your collar
Leave the guns and the crack and the knives for a while
Check me and Chad on the cover of InStyle
On your television set, dancin and prancin
Just last week I sold three beats to Hanson
I’m in your video, I’ll be in more
Without my beat you’re poor
so what you argue for?
I get more camera time than a video whore
Yo Bussa-Bus, school em some more

[Busta Rhymes]
Straight from the mouth of mighty Busta Rhymes
When your album doesn’t sell you better belieeeeve it’s desperate times
Cause I can do a song and get nothing today
And tomorrow Do the Dew and collect major pay, ha!
Far from the Leaders, cause they were holding me back
Now tell me, was anyone really feelin “Make It Clap”?
Or was I so ubiquitous that you just nodded along
You little suckers… I can’t believe you play that Pussycat Dolls song

[The Game]
It’s time to start a beef and move units
Me and 50 talk shit and you know you rush to it
You buy the mix CD, or download it
Either way, your attention I own it
For a few but what to do
Is fake some violence and break the silence
On the coast that we call the West
Snoop left town so by default I’m best
I started off on an independent
To make the Bigga Figga money was unintended
So now I’ll sue him, so he’s not paid
Anything to keep from seeing my name fade


[Memphis Bleek]
I’m Memph Bleek and I’m a born again hype-man
Here to say that if you help promote the right man
Your fame will develop and grow to another level
They say I’m just a tax write-off for the devil
But Lyor sees it, and he’s no fool
Because everyone knows that Jay-Z rules
So I gotta record deal and that’s just wrong
My raps are weak but my connections are strong

This is all about, no doubt, self-promotion
So here–take a sip of my Sizzurp potion
(sound of a drink being chugged, then a person vomiting, then a cash register) Bling!
My name’s been stated, Dame Dash created
Thoughts of “Horse and a Carriage” have faded
The only thing left is the pair of keys to my Range, pink-plated
I eBayed it
Everyone said Cam went out like a chump
But I had the internet goin’ nuts–word up
It doesn’t make you the big man, and
To make records that don’t Soundscan, and
The self-promotion of Cam was all part of the plan
Because now Dipset is in full demand, understand?


[50 Cent]
My name is 50 Cent, a brand name not a gangster
Dissed Ja Rule… in “Wanksta”
Oiled and shirtless, it’s him I’ve become
Do LL love raps, then beef with everyone
But on the low, I’m all about peace
Robbin and killin and murderin has all ceased
G-Unit’s meal ticket can’t be caught in the beast
Nobody buying another Yayo release!

Aiyyo here’s the situation: Beyonce
In 20 years, not a good policy
Therefore I must ignore, kids and weight gain
Hov is out the door once she lookin Aretha Franklin
But I’ve been lucky before, you remember the start
2 rappers shot each other, it made me chart
Now I’m a figurehead of a label, people
Spas with Lyor, treated as an equal
They call me legit now, nuh uh, still pull a caper
Tell artists I don’t write my contracts down on paper
Jeezy bought it, and now to me his money I’m payin
Label starts failin, make a comeback, sayin

[Mike Jones]
Yo Jay-Z, deep in the heart of the matter
The self-promotion is confirmed by the data
Repeating your name as often as you masturbate
Givin out your number to every fool in the States
This hides the fact all your ideas you’ve plucked
Recycling the act cause you’re untalented as fuck
A whitey in the crew will help your numbers
South… rappers… get… a… pass… to blunder about


[Snoop Dogg, Diddy]
Yes we urge to splurge we live for the love
Of ourselves, and the hacks we bring along
(Doggy’s Angels did a song?)
Filling our videos with big-boned sisters
who used to be dudes (Ki Toyyyee, ran for LSU)
Rap’s dead you dread, still got another house to build
Get paid to shuffle up in that Actor’s Guild, come on
From thuggin with B.I.G. and Suge to America’s mascots in ascots
Whatever keeps you paid is all part of the plot
Of course it’s…


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