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Freakish Human Skeleton and Lindsay Lohan an Item

By a Gossiping Bitch on March 11th, 2005

CoupledRumors were confirmed yesterday when teenaged actress / singer Lindsay Lohan announced that she and a freakish, living human skeleton were indeed a couple. The pair had been seen groping each other at the movie premiere for Hostage, which caused a scandal to reverberate throughout Hollywood. “It just makes me sick,” said one traveling assistant that asked not to be named, “not because of the age difference, but because of the nauseating clacking of that skeleton’s bones whenever he changes position.” After a pause, the assistant added, “Have you ever been on a bus or something and the person next to you won’t stop cracking their knuckles? It was like that.”

“I know some people won’t approve of me seeing a living skeleton,” explained Lohan on her weblog, “but I’m not doing this to make everyone happy. The skeleton and I are doing just fine.” At press time, the freakish skeleton had yet to make a comment, though his elation was apparent in his grin.

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