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Hip-Hoppers Hit Up Harry’s Hogwart

By a Gossiping Bitch on September 4th, 2003

Reuters news service reports a gang of hip-hop listening vandals have attacked and defaced Harry Potter’s train, the Hogwarts Express using aerosol paint; an act better known as graffiti. The train, which actively serves travelers between Scarborough and York, is estimated at costing more than $5,000 to repair.

“The people who did this are mindless toerags,” stated James Shuttleworth, from the West Coast Railway Company which operates the train. “It’s not even a burner, it’s a fucking throw-up, for Christ’s sake.”

An apprentice of magic or the dark, forbidden arts have only two options to enter the world of Harry Potter: one is to smoke PCP excessively for 5 years. The other is to catch a ride on the Hogwarts Express; the preferred means of travel between our “normal” reality, and that of Harry Potter’s world of magicians and freaks.

Harry Potter was unobtainable for reaction at press time.

Hip-Hoppers Hit Up Harry's Hogwart

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