Gossiping Bitches

Peter Rosenberg Accuses You of Selling Out

Radio (old-timey, not internet) personality, 3 minute Youtube snippet sensation, and white person Peter Rosenberg has again caused controversy that will be forgotten in 24 hours when he called out Your lack of hip-hop integrity.

Rosenberg hosting a television game show

“I’m gonna be real here, is that still possible in this environment?” Rosenberg asked on his late night Hot 97 show Sunday.

“Go ahead, be real, man. Drop the realness,” DJ Cipha Sounds replied, supportively.

“I’m gonna take it there, I don’t care,” Rosenberg continued. “Sometimes I have to keep it real, consequences be damned. You are the biggest sellout in the history of hip-hop. First off, You have steady employment. I’ve seen You at the bank making deposits, to savings AND checking. I was watching CNBC and You were trading stocks and all that. I caught You in Your car — a Camry, I might add, with no boomin system — listening to POP RADIO with Your kids. Where’s the Eminem? Where’s the Slaughterhouse? Where’s the anything else associated with Em?

“I was next to You on the train, and instead of throwing up a phat burner, You just sat there like nothing. On Your way to an organic grocery store, You told me. Rolling Your eyes when I asked if You were gonna pick up a Garcia y Vega on the way back. I was completely serious! When I tried to start a cypher, You just went back to Your magazine. Not Source. Not Rap Pages. Not XXL. New Yorker! The sci-fi edition, but still! Can we still call this hip-hop at this point? Is the real hip-hop extinct?”

“It may be,” responded Sounds, gravely.

The rant went on for several 90s jeep beat instrumentals, but was no doubt lost on You, who was probably watching Tivo’d Mad Men and eating Greek yogurt or some wack shit like that. Rosenberg refused to back down from similar comments he made about You at Hot 97’s annual Summer Jam festival, sponsored by such dope products and services as Pepsi, E&J, and the Manhattan Center for Vaginal Surgery.

Rosenberg signed off with a concession to Your hip-hop credibility back in the day, and insisted his attack on Your personality was in no way personal. Then he, Sounds, and the one girl had a final good laugh at You, closing out another night on Hot 97, where hip-hop is on assisted living.

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