news: Guess What I Just Heard


Bush Camp Continues Secondhand Dissing

By a Gossiping Bitch on October 12th, 2004

The Internet — In a continued effort to avoid having to deal with any issues of consequence, the presidential campaign of John Kerry expressed tedious outrage over the attack ads of another newly formed so-called independent “527” political group. In one such ad targeting Senator Kerry, a television spot paid for by a group calling itself the Old School Hip-hop Muthafuckas for da’ Troof, Yo, Kerry’s professed “fascination with hip-hop” was refuted by middle-aged b-boys, rappers, and graffiti artists.

Spaghetti Limbs“There are serious questions about John Kerry’s downess with the culture, yo,” says Bronx area b-boy Spaghetti Limbs in the ad. “I mean, I never saw him at the park! Did you? He straight up lied about all that shit.”

Miami based graffiti writer SAT 740 further states, “Ay yo, all I’m saying is this: when the chips were down, you couldn’t count on a motherfucker. I got stabbed one night on the yards over some bullshit, and the police came on the scene and started beating my ass down! I’m like, ‘why ain’t you doing this to my assailant, man?!’ But they took my ass up to county, all bleeding in the holding cell and shit. The blood mixed with some of the orange I had on my fingers, and that shit looked tight! I told my man who shot his wife that if I ever got the fuck up out that piece, I’d use that bloody orange color on the Superman mural I was doing. Anyway, the point I’m trying to make is that when the Krylon was empty, John Kerry’s ass was nowhere to be found.”

Another member of the group, former hip-house rapper Rainshower Flow was contacted to comment on this article, but declined, citing “all the goddamn bank we making off this shit from these Texas fools” as his reason.

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