Posts Tagged ‘midwest’
GB Sells Out (Yet Again) to Nokia
January 9th, 2006
Gossiping Bitches proudly announces our joint cash gettin’ venture with Nokia, as part of their “It’s Your Life in There” ad campaign. Below, you will find various figures discussing one of the great joys of cell phone use: deleting the numbers of motherfuckers you don’t like anymore.
“Final Solution” Found for Scribble Security Concerns
August 15th, 2005
This past weekend’s Scribble Jam hip-hop event went smoothly despite security concerns that had previously lead organizers to threaten cancellation. They dealt with the logistical problems of searching all attendees’ backpacks by banning them from the premises altogether. But another, less publicized security issue presented itself as ticket holders began queuing outside the venue, forcing […]
Scribble Jam 2005 Canceled
August 1st, 2005
Today it was announced that Scribble Jam, the annual Mid-Western celebration of White music culture, has been canceled, with promoters fearing complications due to the heightened security measures following the recent London subway bombings. “You have to understand, everyone attending this event will be wearing a backpack,” says promoter Klaus Hoeppner. “It’s just a logistical nightmare.”
U.S. Intelligence Makes Pale Mistake
March 24th, 2004
In a recently declassified document, released by the United States Office of Internal Records, it was confirmed that a surgical strike force was dispatched in 2003 to Cincinnati, Ohio where the government suspected that a large gathering of the Ku Klux Klan was to effectively converge between August 7-10. The report states that the operation […]
Thousands Set to Attend Their First Hip-Hop Show
March 22nd, 2004
August 12-15 will mark the return of the annual Scribble Jam event to Cincinnati, Ohio (see This Just In: Hip-Hop Dead), rumored to be hosting the first-ever hip-hop popping battle in history. Gossiping Bitches has dispatched a special report team which can be identified by the associated logo you see on your screen. Stay tuned […]
Gossip 101
January 5th, 2004
Our sources stay anonymous, our mercy is none, we spot blowin’ maaaaan. We’ll show ya how to gossip. Yeah, it’s a new year with new fears, but before we play a friendly game of Who Can Ruin Whose Career, let’s cover a few basics. There are tons of gossipy rumors flying around–some of them many years old, some of them pretty new, all of them juicy. So before we start punching throats in the ’04, we Gossiping Bitches wanted to start addressing some of these rumors so you can know what’s fact and what’s fiction. So we now present to you the first installment: Gossip 101.
3X Dose of Disappointment
October 21st, 2003
The cover to the new Dose One record is said to be “disappointing” amongst fans of the honkey tonk lover, Dosey D. Mush Records, the label releasing the album, says it is the largest budget it has produced for a single emcee to date. “I just think it’s really cruel to show dogs being tortured,” […]
News Flash: Brother Ali Admits Neither Black nor Muslim
October 20th, 2003
In a startling turn of events, Minnesota-based rapper, Brother Ali has admitted he’s neither a “brother” nor a Muslim named “Ali”. Fans were in shock at coffee shops across the globe. A concerted “Slamming of Laptop Lids” is being planned in protest. A spokesperson for Rhymesayers Entertainment, Brother Ali’s record label, declined to comment regarding […]
This Just in: Hip-Hop Dead
September 2nd, 2003
Thousands of white people descended onto Cincinnati, Ohio for the annual Scribble Jam event between August 7-10, 2003. Using a special new camera technology co-developed by Kodak and AOL/Time Warner, our on-site photographer managed to take the following picture which helps expose Devils in Disguise; a trait betrayed on film by their redish-reflective eyes: Yes, […]