Pete Carroll to Manage Jurassic 5
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 28th, 2006
Anticipating a loss to Ohio State in the upcoming national championship game, University of Southern California head football coach Pete Carroll held a press conference today to announce his retirement from college football and his new employment as the manager of old-school reenactment troupe, Jurassic 5. “I could not be more pumped or jacked about this opportunity,” said Carroll.
Thug Rappers Outraged by Seinfeld Actor’s Rants
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 25th, 2006
The nation is still reacting to the shocking comments of actor/comedian Michael Richards at a Los Angeles comedy club last weekend. All talk of never-ending foreign wars and crippling economic inequality at home has been put aside, as Richards’ racist taunts have become Issue #1 on the national agenda, closely followed by Heisman Trophy winner O.J. Simpson’s equally shocking desire to make money.
Open Job Offer to Nick Sylvester
By a Gossiping Bitch on March 3rd, 2006
Gossiping Bitches proudly offers (former?) Village Voice/Pitchfork writer Nick Sylvester the position of associate editor. Not to say we need any new talent or anything; you’ll have to compete with several of the brightest writers on the web for precious space on a dynamic, constantly updating website. But the fact can’t be denied: we like your style.
“The 8 Mile of … ” Everything Coming Soon
By a Gossiping Bitch on January 30th, 2006
Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity to seize everything you ever wanted — one moment — would you capture it or just let it slip? Well, thanks to Hollywood, you’ll find out the answer to this question over and over again in the coming years.
Thug Rappers Clamor for "Shiny Object #7"
By a Gossiping Bitch on January 28th, 2006
“Yeah, I may be coming back and whatever. I’m having sex with Beyonce. Def Jam doing alright. Young Jeezy moving units. Drug raps! Who would have thought it? But what I’m really most excited about right now is that I got an order for Shiny Object #7. I’m supposed to be one of the first ones in the world getting it. I think it’s like some prince in the Middle East and then me. This thing is gonna change the hip-hop game. Either you got it, or your career is over. Y’know?!”
GB Sells Out (Yet Again) to Nokia
By a Gossiping Bitch on January 9th, 2006
Gossiping Bitches proudly announces our joint cash gettin’ venture with Nokia, as part of their “It’s Your Life in There” ad campaign. Below, you will find various figures discussing one of the great joys of cell phone use: deleting the numbers of motherfuckers you don’t like anymore.
Year End Dist
By a Gossiping Bitch on December 31st, 2005
Gossiping Bitches proudly announces that it will not be publishing a “Best Albums of 2005” list, making us the Only People on the Internet not to assume you cared what they thought was good. In the past, many of you have expressed dissatisfaction with our rather casual and intermittent posting schedule, but at times like […]
RZA Not Ready to Give Up on “Bong-Bong” Just Yet
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 3rd, 2005
Those familiar with the print interviews and television appearances of Wu-tang Clan’s RZA in recent years have noticed his penchant for punctuating his comments with the catchphrase “bong-bong!” Usually the peculiar phrase is met with indifference by the interviewer, without a plea for explanation. RZA says that is just the problem.
Star-Bucka-Bucka-Blaow!
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 3rd, 2005
Last month, Starbucks, the notorious Seattle-based caffeine cartel, announced the establishment of their latest stronghold in the rough and tumble neighborhood of Compton, California. Compton, widely credited as the birthplace of The Gangsta Rap and considered one of the most dangerous cities in America (I see you East St. Louis), is a far cry from […]
Rawkus: Who’d A Crunk It?
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 24th, 2005
Rawkus Records is officially back in business, but those expecting a return to the underground sounds that made them famous may be in for a bit of a surprise. The newly reactivated label today issued a press release stating that all operations will be moved from their original New York City headquarters to Memphis, Tennessee, […]