GB1’s: “I Hate the Everything” Pt. 1
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 11th, 2004
Talking out your ass is an American tradition. We live in a culture where not knowing what the hell you’re talking about is rewarded if you are able to maintain an obnoxiously authoritative tone about it. So the GBs got together and thought, "What if we got a bunch of desperate C-List celebrities together to comment and cap on various pop-culture topics?
“HHS-ychic” Hotline to Open
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 4th, 2004
Online hip-hop retailer HipHopSite today announced plans for a psychic hotline. The fee-based service, to be named “HHS-ychic,” will allow callers to listen to HipHopSite employees making bold predictions about hip-hop culture. “From an early age, people always suspected I had a gift,” said un-certified psychic, part-time Ed-from-Sandbox hater, and full-time honky Pizzo. “I just […]
Gossiping Bitches Presidential Endorsement
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 1st, 2004
Let’s face it: There are plenty of reasons to vote against all of these people, or to just go the KRS route and vote for crazy. But on November 2, when you’re staring down a ballot giving you a “choice” between Squinty, Longface, Lazy-Eye, and 7 other dudes you never heard of, what the fuck […]
Music, Watch – The Lost Tapes
By a Gossiping Bitch on November 1st, 2004
Rappers are such pussies these days, I swear – how you gonna appear in someone else’s video with the sole purpose of getting your ass beat? Character or not, that’s some weak shit. I mean, we all wanna see Bones 2: Still Bonin’ get made but damn Snoop, put out some more “Fa Shizzle” key chains or pot holders or something – stop slummin’ it.
GB-Lite Debuts
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 27th, 2004
Gossiping Bitches Inc. today announced the debut of their latest web venture, GB-Lite. The site features a more graphic-intensive design coupled with less complex articles, reviews, and features, a combination they’re hoping will please non-fans old and new alike. “We received a lot of emails, phone calls, faxes, and smoke signals from people saying ‘I […]
Ashlee Simpson Victim of Smear Campaign
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 26th, 2004
Appearing on the October 23rd episode of NBC’s Saturday Night Live, Ashlee Simpson was surprised when, during her second set, her band deigned to play the song from her first set. This confused Ms. Simpson, and she was stymied while her backing track played over the theatre’s PA system to the wrong music. She left […]
Punchline Emcees Scramble to Work Yankees Loss into Raps
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 22nd, 2004
After the New York Yankees’ monumental loss to the Boston Red Sox in Major League Baseball’s American League Championship Series, many opportunistic rappers are already considering punchlines to take advantage of the situation. From backpackers to homo-thugs, emcees are working at a fever pitch to come up with similes relating to the series for use […]
Backroom Whispers
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 18th, 2004
Is the major Hollywood actor who likes call girls to take a shit on glass tables while he lies underneath in only high-heels, simultaneously crying and masturbating, the same major Hollywood actor who was photographed at a party some years ago, enthusiastically fucking a pit-bull?
Supreme Court “Can’t Fucking Wait” to Overturn Sampling Decision
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 12th, 2004
Secret Bomb Shelter, Washington D.C. — After a 6th Circuit Court of Appeals decision putting prohibitive restraints on sampling and effectively ending hip-hop as Puffy knows it, the U.S. Supreme Court is reportedly “chomping, for the sake of argument, at the hypothetical bit” to reverse the ruling in its current term, according to aides. “Whatever […]
Bush Camp Continues Secondhand Dissing
By a Gossiping Bitch on October 12th, 2004
The Internet — In a continued effort to avoid having to deal with any issues of consequence, the presidential campaign of John Kerry expressed tedious outrage over the attack ads of another newly formed so-called independent “527” political group. In one such ad targeting Senator Kerry, a television spot paid for by a group calling […]